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The Rezort (movie review)

I kinda like zombie movies. And zombie-themed games as well. Because, you know, what’s there not to be liked? Anyway, I’m not gonna make up some philosophy shit here, just want to talk about this little movie.

I was aware of the game Dead Island and I was also aware that 2015 movie The Rezort was (loosely) based on that game. So, little late, but anyway – better than never… I am still fighting the unbelievably long period of problem with focusing on doing anything, so thanks to Netflix – it could have proved itself to be a cure. Don’t know, but I do care, folks. I do.

OK, enough about my current problems, lol. Let’s get to The Rezort.

This is a British zombie horror. Errr…let’s correct that sentence. So, again – this is British zombie movie. Not much horror here – and seriously, I’d doubt if there are many zombie movies which one can classify as horror, but whatever floats your boat and to each their own, as they say. The story is quite predictable, you have seen it quite a few times already.

Oh, story…There is, you’ve guessed it, The Rezort. It’s the place when you can come and shoot zombies, the leftovers from the global zombie virus infection. Not bad, right? Yes, it’s rightfully called Jurrasic Park, but with zombies.

And as you could expect, something goes wrong and the zombies now roam free and attacking the good folks at The Rezort…who’s gonna survive?

To be honest, I am glad this haven’t turned into another mindless gore-drenched bloodbath. The zombies don’t even play the main roles here, and their attacks are just few and not particularly gory. And although I watch zombie movies for zombies tearing their unfortunately victims apart (yeah, I shouldn’t cheer, but some people just f*ckin’ deserve it!), this one was more about the cynism of business (this particular one) and some people’s choices (and I will say it here – fighting for rights of the undead is just plainly stupid).

It wasn’t perfect, although it’s understandable there has to be some breach in security, the way Sadie has managed to get into the IT room to download the files (and unknowingly, unleash the computer virus) was just too easy. Sorry, it would never happen this way! And, also, the way Archer and Melanie escaped while zombies attacked…that was just unbelievable. The usual problem I have – I just want all stupid persons on the screen die. Not particularly horribly, but let them die anyway. Here, the only person deserving to survive is …nah, I won’t spoil, but you will guess it when you see this person’s action.

Apart from some things like what I just have mentioned, the movie was more than decent. I don’t think I will watch it again anytime soon, but I was not bored – and that’s usually a good sign, right? (Yep, it is!).

Rudolf Schütz

A father to two little perpetuum mobiles called kids, Rudolf is a main force behind The Rubber Axe webzine, a bookworm, musick lover and a movie fan - not to mention his virgin forays into the comics and board/card games.

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